Permissions and Relationships

Some things are like a glass of wine. Getting one is as easy as saying, “can I have a glass of wine?” You can even be more specific and ask for a Sauvignon Blanc and you might get it.

Other things, like relationships, are a little different. We don't always need nice questions to give or get permission. We simply act the thing out and when we do, we give the other person permission to do it right back.

When you hit me, you give me permission to hit you back.
When you’re nice to me, you give me permission to be nice to you.
When you lie to me, you give me permission to lie to you
When you judge me, you give me permission to judge you
When you give me gifts, you give me permission to do the same
When you make time for me, you give me permission…
When you smile at me, you give me permission…
When you offer help, you give permission…
When you cheat, you give permission…
When you scream…
When you’re complacent…
When you don’t text…
When you…
When you…
When you…

Unlike a glass of Sauvignon Blanc, we don't need to ask.

Of course, it takes people with character to respond to negative permissions with kindness and intent, it could make all the difference in a relationship, but it pays to consider, the permissions we give.

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Olabanji Stephen

Olabanji Stephen

I see the world differently and attempt to interpret it in ways that inspire genius